Which is the better choice for me?

This evening, I attended an information workshop at a local agency specializing in international adoption. I was the only person to show up at the workshop. Turned out to be a good thing. The presenter was also a single mother (although much older than I and not by choice), and we had an interesting talk.

It's great to get more information on the process. I was so excited, just sitting there thinking about the fact that I could start tomorrow, and have a child within a year.

And that's the thing. When considering having my own child through artificial insemination, vs. pursuing an adoption, I am really torn. If finances weren't an issue at all, I suppose I would choose insemination (although even as I write this I still have reservations about wanting to go through that difficult process). But the truth is that finances are an issue--a big one.

Here's how I see it as a logical, practical human being. Adoption is a sure thing. Yes, I will spend upwards of $25,000, but in the end, I will have a child. The one thing I have learned from reading other women's blogs is that even IVF is not a sure thing. 10s of thousands of dollars can be spent on the process and the end result may still be: no baby.

It sounds like such a commercial transaction when I put it that way! But I guess it's the reality.

Here's the other thing that is affecting my decision. I have endometriosis, one of the primary causes of female infertility. I've never had any fertility tests done, so I could be perfectly fine. I just have a gut (or uterine) feeling that I will have difficulty conceiving.

Either way, I'm going to have to start saving money, and I mean seriously. What I'm thinking--and this plan might completely change--is that I give myself 3 to 5 years to save the money. In the meantime, I try some of the less expensive modes of insemination, which would include, I suppose, home insem (via sperm bank, or dare I say Ex Number 2), and perhaps ICI or IUI. Am I skipping anything? I need to learn more about all this stuff. To the blogs!!