I've had one of these weeks where I've thought very little about ttc. I think the last month of decision-making and thinking has been so overwhelming that psychologically I just needed a break.
Part of it was that last weekend I had a talk with my mom, who happened to have spent a few days last week with my big brother (lawyer brother, the one helping me with the kd contract). Of course I pried her a bit and asked "What did you two talk about, hmmm??" She admitted that they had discussed my plans, and then she said "He's worried. He made me worry."
Ummm. About what, mom? Is it the legal stuff, or other stuff?
"He just thinks you might not know what you're getting yourself into."
Oh. My. God. Is that not the most annoying thing to say? And frankly, to think? Not only is it condescending, but here's the REALLY ridiculous (not to mention ironic) thing: my big brother and his wife have made the decision NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN. Their decision is completely off limits to all family (no one is allowed to discuss it with them). Being a prying sister, I did have one discussion with my brother about it and he admitted, "I'm just scared; I don't know if I'd be a good father; I don't want to 'give up our life' for something that scares me so much."
This is the man saying he "worries I don't know what I'm getting myself into." Of course he worries!! HE doesn't know what I'm getting myself into! (and, apparently, has always been too scared to find out)! So you see why that statement is doubly annoying.
For God's sake. This is what I get for involving family at this early stage. Luckily, when I pointed out how ridiculous it was for him to say that, my mom said, "Oh. You're right. I feel better now." Poor woman.
But the rub of it is that I spent all weekend thinking maybe he was right! Grr. Family.
So I took the week off from thinking somehow. I went out two evenings and stayed out too late (once with the man from the last post...more later!). I worked my ass off. I made fun plans for the weekend.
And now, I feel ready again. Onward. Onward. Onward.